Good Line, Bad Line

I’m sharing some emails again….

These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line… but the least romantic second line.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don’t take that paper bag off of your face

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes –
Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe “go to hell”

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

3 Replies to “Good Line, Bad Line”

  1. For the record, Colleen and I have been formulating rhymes of our own. Wouldn’t want them to end up hidden in the tagboard archives forever… 8)

    Without you by my side, honey, I would be sinking fast
    but I’m just drunk so this feeling wouldn’t last

    my love for you is tender, so sweet and so true…
    now that I’ve said that, can I now fuck you?

    I could never go wrong coz your love is my inspiration
    but this relationship and your face has reached its expiration

    Everytime I think of your sweet face;
    I want to rip out your eyes and put you in your place.

    You’re so beautiful, it makes me cry;
    Now rot in hell you selfish asshole, die die die!

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