Dreams and Smokes

I’ve only admired you from afar. For so long I have kept the feelings deep within the recesses of my heart, and at the back of my mind. I know I can only admire you like I would a star. And I admire you for your eloquence, your intelligence, your humor, your wit. And I admire you for how you make me smile, how you seduce me, and how you make me laugh at myself after because you tell me it’s a joke. I admire you for how high you’ve achieved and how far up I believe you’d still go.

Still

Just when I think I’m getting my footing back…
When I think I can walk away…
He says something to pull me back in.
Into this world where he is the sunrise and the sunset.
A world he doesn’t know but he is the center of.
A world that I would forget, if I only knew how.

Promises

lately you’ve been cold
insensitive
uncaring and unreachable

you promised to me
this love of ours won’t change
but why has it come to this?

it feels like you’ve left
you left without goodbye
you left me without telling why

am I still in your heart?
I just want you to know
my love for you hasn’t changed

will my troubled heart
be left waiting
for your promises?

what should I do?
Should I wait for you?
But why? why did you go?

will you still come back?
come back to my arms?
will I ever feel your love again?

Foolish

I have been hurt before, hurt all over
and I think my heart will no longer mend
I have found solace in being alone
for there is no one to turn to. I can’t depend.
I’ve given up on love, I’ve given up on “us”
given up on finding joy and completion
They say I’m strong but I’m not
Sometimes I also need love and attention

You found me, and taught me to smile again
You made me feel different, made me new
And in time you opened my heart to love
You became special, I learned to love you
You took care of me, pampered me,
comforted me and made me smile
You told me you love me,
gave me attention, even for a while

Uncertain

I feel like a fool uncertain of what I should tell you, and what I should feel
Should I love you because you say you love me? Because you say you’re real?
But words are just words and only comes from the mind and mouth
How can I be certain if distance hinders us from finding out?

I have so many questions, about you, your life and all
Why do I have a feeling that I am starting to fall?
But a tired heart can’t be certain for it has been broken before
Can you love and accept my past, my present and more?

Life Without You?

Everything’s been said and done and I’m still here
I’m here dazed and confused with what’s going on in this world…

you can’t see the dreams I’ve made for you,
Oh and I can’t imagine a life without you..

Are you still there my love?
I can no longer see you, could no longer grasp you..

Is there a way to get to you?
coz I can’t imagine life when you’re gone…

I can’t imagine life without you…

——————————————–
tonight is depressing.