I Wish I Wasn’t

[audio:iwish.mp3]

I wish that you were home
Holding me tight in your arms
And I wish, I could go back
To the day before we met and skip my regret
I wish I wasn’t in love with you
So you couldn’t hurt me..

Maybe I’m fast to conclude and that I still have you. Maybe I did lose you or maybe I didn’t lose you, because I never had you. Maybe it’s not you, maybe it’s more of me, wanting something I couldn’t have. Maybe I wish I was dead. Maybe I’m better off marrying my obnoxious computer too. Fuck. I hate myself today.

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I just noticed, the mp3 jumped. Hate me.

0 Replies to “I Wish I Wasn’t”

  1. I’ve never seen you swear! 😯

    I can tell you’re hurting a lot, know I am here anytime you want to talk. I really wish you weren’t hurting. Now I know how it feels to see your friend in pain. 😥

  2. Thanks Colleen. Right now, I’m wearing a mask of indifference. I don’t want to deal. It’s too early, too raw, and too painful.

    I’m sorry I didn’t censor the swear. I can’t bring myself to not really say it.

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