Life

Am I In Love or Heart Broken?

May 22, 2007

I am confused like hell today.

What’s so confusing about that? You can’t break your heart if you’re not in love. But you could be in love and not heartbroken… that means you’re content. If you are feeling confused, in love and heart broken, then may be you aren’t content?

I knew that was coming, and to answer that, I am longing to be content. I am in love and a bit heart broken. I want to find contentment also.

I am in Love

I have been in love for a long time and this damned love has been growing since. I know it’s taboo to be a single mom and then fall in love with someone so soon. I know what other’s would think if they find out the truth I have found out. I know that others would want me to give it up. And maybe I should give it up.

I am in love. Greatly in love amidst the complications, the pain and the anxiety. I am in love.

I am also heart broken

… because I am scared of what we have and don’t have. I am foolish and rash and aware of the consequences I would get for falling in love. But I don’t want to lose him either, I don’t want to think he’d go. It’s a long distance relationship and some things were left unspoken for a long time.. I can only also wish he isn’t ashamed of me or isn’t denying me. ๐Ÿ™

So you see my dilemma here? I am getting insecure… And when you are feeling in need of security, how do you turn to him? -sigh- I don’t know. I just miss him so.

You Might Also Like

No Comments

  • Reply Jake The Miserable May 22, 2007 at 11:51 am

    Sabi ng isang kaibigan sa’kin, “kung hindi ka masasaktan at magiging apektado, hindi mo malalaman na nagmamahal ka na pala.”

    Sabi ko, “timpla mo akong kape.”

    Manalig ka lang, minamahal na kaibigan. After all, who says it’s gonna be easy? ๐Ÿ˜‰ (Though alam nating lahat na bitter pa rin ako.)

  • Reply kennots May 23, 2007 at 1:47 am

    “I can only also wish he isnรขโ‚ฌโ„ขt ashamed of me or isnรขโ‚ฌโ„ขt denying me.” – bat ka naman nya idedeny? o ikakahiya?

    Hindi ka ba nagsasabi sa kanya na insecure ka na? Yan kasi ang mahirap pag masyado kang masikreto sa feelings mo. Nasasaktan ka na, di mo parin sinasabi. nag-uusap ba kayo?

  • Reply Colleen May 23, 2007 at 6:37 am

    It will get better. It takes time but I do believe you’ll get all the answers you seek as time goes on.

    Additionally, being “in love” is temporary. It’s a kind of love you can fall out of, OR it will turn into real love.

    Possibly you’re in love with being in love, time will tell.

    Ideally, you reach a point where you love unconditionally. That’s the best kind of love. I love my man unconditionally, as you know. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Don’t worry, you’ll figure it out. If it’s any reassurance, I do think he loves you, he’s just needing some time after recent events.

    Take this all however you like, I am not expert and being advised myself! haha! ๐Ÿ˜€

    I’m kooky. ๐Ÿ˜†

  • Reply joiz May 25, 2007 at 1:08 pm

    Yes, I believe things will get better…

    I hope it gets better soon!

    This quote has just doused my heart with cold water and I’m freezing in vain…

    “If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away, if he doesn’t, nothing can make him stay. Never let him know everything, he will use it against you later. He is a man, nothing more, nothing less. You should never look for someone to complete you.”

  • Reply detoxified_alipunga May 26, 2007 at 2:27 pm

    mare

    I have two words for you (uso to sa barkada ah, sino bang nagpasimuno nito? si joel? o si justin?)

    HAVE. FAITH.

    it will get better sis. and if it doesn’t, there’s always kennots para pagtripan. no believe me joiz, you got lots of admirers, takot lang sayo, chope kasi ๐Ÿ˜ณ

  • Reply mikmak May 27, 2007 at 12:03 am

    hahaha and you’re one of them detox? teka sino nga ba si detox? si tom? o si matthew? para kasi kayong kambal di malaman kung alin si alin.

    girl, broken hearted ka na naman ba? ano ba yan, bigo ka naman ata lagi sa love life. bat di na lang kasi sa barkada kumuha ng jowa, dami dami naman nilang boys, astig dib mga yayo na, jowa pa! pero di nga sis, may kanya kanyang tyempo mga boys. minsan mabagal, minsan mabilis, siguro kaya nya di sinasabi sayong mahal ka nya kasi para mamiss mo. ayun lang, ambilis mo namiss haha nainip ka tuloy. open up to him, sabihin mo ng diretso wag ka lang magmukhang tanga ah

    good luck sa love life natin!

  • Reply Colleen May 27, 2007 at 1:32 am

    You have me!! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ ๐Ÿ˜ฎ ๐Ÿ˜

    But do you want me? hehe…

  • Reply joiz May 27, 2007 at 1:46 am

    @Colleen: Oh lala! I need love smilies…. :love: ๐Ÿ˜›

    @mikmak: detox = tom. And no, he’s not eligible to be a boyfriend by anybody, he’s gay ๐Ÿ˜ฏ hahaha paganti langya

  • Reply genkied May 29, 2007 at 12:08 am

    hay… i think you and colleen would be a cute couple…hihihihihihihi…

  • Reply joiz May 29, 2007 at 3:08 pm

    @genkied: hanep!! baliw!!! ๐Ÿ˜†

  • Leave a Reply